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Bullion.Forum
Jokes
- Thread starter 7.62marksman
- Start date
Help Support Prospecting Australia:
Dave's Office
Have Detector Will Travel
How do you save a pirate who's had a heart attack? You give him CPARRRRR.
Little kid: I like chips
*Me finishing the bag*
"You would've loved these"
*Me finishing the bag*
"You would've loved these"
Chromosomes
XX = Female
XY = Male
YYY = Delilah
XX = Female
XY = Male
YYY = Delilah
If swearing burned calories, I'd be a skinny MF
A Garda stopped at a farm in Co Galway and talked to an old farmer. He told the farmer, "I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs." The farmer said, "okay, but don't go into that field over there...", as he pointed out the location. The Garda verbally exploded and said, "look mister, I have the authority of the garda Síochána with me!" Reaching into his rear back pocket, the arrogant garda removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the farmer. "See this badge?! This badge means I can go wherever I want... On any land! No questions asked, no answers given! Do you understand old man?!"
The farmer kindly nodded, apologized, and went about his farm work. Moments later the farmer heard loud screams, he looked up and saw the garda running for his life, being chased by the farmers big Bull Mc Cabe With every step the bull was gaining ground on the garda, and it was likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified. The old farmer threw down his tools, ran as fast as he could to the fence, and yelled at the top of his lungs......
"YOUR BADGE! SHOW HIM YOUR BADGE!"
Ya facking eejit
The farmer kindly nodded, apologized, and went about his farm work. Moments later the farmer heard loud screams, he looked up and saw the garda running for his life, being chased by the farmers big Bull Mc Cabe With every step the bull was gaining ground on the garda, and it was likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified. The old farmer threw down his tools, ran as fast as he could to the fence, and yelled at the top of his lungs......
"YOUR BADGE! SHOW HIM YOUR BADGE!"
Ya facking eejit
Irish girls challenge.
God created the donkey and said to him, “You'll be a donkey and carry everyone's burden and will live for 40 years.” The donkey said, “Carrying burdens is OK, but 40 years is too much for me, give me only 30 years.” God granted his wish.
God created the dog and said to him, “You will be a dog and look after people's belongings. You'll eat whatever you are given by your masters and live for 40 years .” ” The dog said, ”All conditions are fine, but 40 years is too much for this job. Give me only 20 years.” God granted his wish.
God then created the monkey and said to him, ”You will be a monkey and entertain others with your tricks. You will live for 40 years.” The monkey said, “God 40 years is too much for me, give me only 30 years.” God granted his wish.
God then created man and said to him, “You will be a man and live for 25 years. You will dominate all other creatures.” Then the man said, ”25 years is too little for a great creature like me. Give me the 10 years that the donkey refused, the 20 years that the dog refused, and the 10 years that the monkey refused.” God granted his wish.
From then on, a man lives 25 years as a man, 10 years as a donkey, carrying all the burdens of his house, 20 years as a dog, taking care of his children and eating whatever he is given, and 10 years as a monkey, going from house to house entertaining his grandchildren!
God created the dog and said to him, “You will be a dog and look after people's belongings. You'll eat whatever you are given by your masters and live for 40 years .” ” The dog said, ”All conditions are fine, but 40 years is too much for this job. Give me only 20 years.” God granted his wish.
God then created the monkey and said to him, ”You will be a monkey and entertain others with your tricks. You will live for 40 years.” The monkey said, “God 40 years is too much for me, give me only 30 years.” God granted his wish.
God then created man and said to him, “You will be a man and live for 25 years. You will dominate all other creatures.” Then the man said, ”25 years is too little for a great creature like me. Give me the 10 years that the donkey refused, the 20 years that the dog refused, and the 10 years that the monkey refused.” God granted his wish.
From then on, a man lives 25 years as a man, 10 years as a donkey, carrying all the burdens of his house, 20 years as a dog, taking care of his children and eating whatever he is given, and 10 years as a monkey, going from house to house entertaining his grandchildren!
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