statusquo
Marc
My mate just got a job driving an ice truck..I thought...
Gee that's a cool job...
Gee that's a cool job...
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Bad Dad Jokes
- Thread starter fjute1955
- Start date
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statusquo
Marc
My mate's bonsai tree business is so successful he has had to move to a smaller shop.
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Whats green and hangs from the trees in Africa?
Giraffe snot.
That's a joke from the 60's in state school !!!
GT
Giraffe snot.
That's a joke from the 60's in state school !!!
GT
statusquo
Marc
Cheers... Been busy at the coal face Scrounger... Time just whizzes by!SCROUNGER said:
Bloke told me last week that I didn't have a sense of humour....I just laughed at him
Doctor told me I had an ulcer... but said not to worry about it
said to my psychiatrist...... "one day I think I am a tee-pee......the next day I think I am a beach-shade"
psychiatrist said to me......"Don't worry about it, you're just too tense"
psychiatrist said to me......"Don't worry about it, you're just too tense"
young man has a motorbike accident, lost both his arms crashing through a windshield....
he wakes up in hospital and screams...."I can't feel my legs!!"
he wakes up in hospital and screams...."I can't feel my legs!!"
Two aircraft carrying car parts collided mid sky. The next day the papers stated that it had been raining Datsun cogs.
A police car and wig truck collided. Two days later the police were still combing the area.
Whats big, green and brown with 6 legs and if it drops out of a tree on you, it will kill you? A billiard table.
My son tells me I've got no patience. I tell him "I don't need patients - I'm not a doctor".
A police car and wig truck collided. Two days later the police were still combing the area.
Whats big, green and brown with 6 legs and if it drops out of a tree on you, it will kill you? A billiard table.
My son tells me I've got no patience. I tell him "I don't need patients - I'm not a doctor".
Concrete Truck collided on the Sydney Harbour Bridge yesterday with a Bun Wagon.
Police are still looking for 3 hardened criminals.
.
A Cessna Aircraft crashed into a cemetery in Dublin a last night.
So far 800 bodies have been recovered and police are still working on it.
Police are still looking for 3 hardened criminals.
.
A Cessna Aircraft crashed into a cemetery in Dublin a last night.
So far 800 bodies have been recovered and police are still working on it.
Police chasing a bloke through the fish market. He stepped on a scale and got aweigh.
Mexican disc jockey Juan moretime. He played a tune by Otis Elivator called Baby I Have My Ups and Downs. Gotta love Cheech and Chong.
Doesn't really belong here, but where?
My granddad (RAAF/RAF WWII) was shot down twice and interred in Germany. The second time he was rather badlh injured and stayed till Armistice. The first time he told me he escaped by:
1. Rubbing his leg till he got a sore.
2. With that he sawed the table in half, and as half and a half makes a whole,
3. He crawled out of the hole to be free.
He then added: I yelled: "I'm free, I'm free" whereupon a little boy adjoined that he was four.
Anyway (I was a whippersnapper when he told me this - at every dinner), he went on:
4. He yelled so much that he got hoarse,
5. So he got on the horse and rode and rode and rode till he got back to England
I don't think he mentioned encountering the English Channel.
My granddad (RAAF/RAF WWII) was shot down twice and interred in Germany. The second time he was rather badlh injured and stayed till Armistice. The first time he told me he escaped by:
1. Rubbing his leg till he got a sore.
2. With that he sawed the table in half, and as half and a half makes a whole,
3. He crawled out of the hole to be free.
He then added: I yelled: "I'm free, I'm free" whereupon a little boy adjoined that he was four.
Anyway (I was a whippersnapper when he told me this - at every dinner), he went on:
4. He yelled so much that he got hoarse,
5. So he got on the horse and rode and rode and rode till he got back to England
I don't think he mentioned encountering the English Channel.
Sorry,
Missed a bit:
6. Rode and rode until he came to a plane.
7. Got on the plane and flew back to England.
My only excuse - That was 45 years + years back
Missed a bit:
6. Rode and rode until he came to a plane.
7. Got on the plane and flew back to England.
My only excuse - That was 45 years + years back
statusquo
Marc
A friend of mine showed me the plans for his invisible aeroplane.
To be honest I can't see it taking off.
To be honest I can't see it taking off.
That sounds like an "OBAMA" joke.-not too bad though!!
Jaros :lol:
Jaros :lol:
