Did you know that pregnant horses go faster ? yep, 2 horsepower
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Bullion.Forum
Bad Dad Jokes
- Thread starter fjute1955
- Start date
Help Support Prospecting Australia:
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2019
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- 830
- Reaction score
- 4,171
The only thing flat-earthers fear, is sphere itself.
Baz out.
Baz out.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2018
- Messages
- 1,327
- Reaction score
- 3,370
Or falling out of a rocket. I saw this the other day.
https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/otilliasteadman/mad-mike-hughes-rocket-death-flat-earth
A tragic way to go .
https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/otilliasteadman/mad-mike-hughes-rocket-death-flat-earth
A tragic way to go .
- Joined
- Jul 3, 2017
- Messages
- 28
- Reaction score
- 45
I sold my vacuum cleaner. Doesn't really matter, it was only collecting dust......
- Joined
- Jul 3, 2017
- Messages
- 28
- Reaction score
- 45
I got a nice compliment on my driving today. Someone put a note on my windscreen saying, "parking fine". Felt nice
Apparently Elton John has put on so much weight hes having his trousers specially made.
So its goodbye normal jeans.
So its goodbye normal jeans.
Thought I knew everything about sandpaper but it appears Ive only been scratching the surface 
layful:
layful:
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2018
- Messages
- 2,060
- Reaction score
- 4,349
Who can drink 20 Litres of Petrol and not get sick?
-Jerry Can!
-Jerry Can!
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2020
- Messages
- 126
- Reaction score
- 97
When is a door not a door - when its a jar.
My apologies in advance.................
My wifes mad at me because she said I never buy her flowers.
I honestly didnt even know she sold flowers.
(At bosses funeral kneeling and whispering at coffin)
"Who's thinking outside the box now Gary?"
I just read a long article comparing the different versions of the Bible.
There was a lot of cross referencing.
What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills ?
Bernadette.
I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthetic.
He said: "Sure, knock yourself out!"
Why can't athiests use exponents?
Because they don't believe in a higher power.
What is the opposite of a croissant?
A happy uncle.
What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts?
A barberqueue.
My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
So I have an uncle, once removed.
I built a model of Mount Everest and my son asked, Is it to scale?
I replied, Noits to look at.
My wifes mad at me because she said I never buy her flowers.
I honestly didnt even know she sold flowers.
(At bosses funeral kneeling and whispering at coffin)
"Who's thinking outside the box now Gary?"
I just read a long article comparing the different versions of the Bible.
There was a lot of cross referencing.
What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills ?
Bernadette.
I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthetic.
He said: "Sure, knock yourself out!"
Why can't athiests use exponents?
Because they don't believe in a higher power.
What is the opposite of a croissant?
A happy uncle.
What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts?
A barberqueue.
My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
So I have an uncle, once removed.
I built a model of Mount Everest and my son asked, Is it to scale?
I replied, Noits to look at.
Here are a couple I heard on the radio today.
Q. What do you call the security people outside of the Samsung shop?
A. Guardians of the Galaxy.
Q. How do you organise a party in space?
A. You plan it.
Cheers
Doug
Q. What do you call the security people outside of the Samsung shop?
A. Guardians of the Galaxy.
Q. How do you organise a party in space?
A. You plan it.
Cheers
Doug
No matter how much you push the envelope it will still be stationery. :8
What do a burnt Pizza
A frozen Beer
And a pregnant woman
have in common
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An idiot that didnt take it out in time
A frozen Beer
And a pregnant woman
have in common
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An idiot that didnt take it out in time
You know your dad and i were happy for 20 years
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Then we met
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Then we met
What do you call a bear with no teeth
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A gummy bear
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A gummy bear
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2018
- Messages
- 2,060
- Reaction score
- 4,349
What do you call a Hen staring at a lettuce?
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Chicken sees a salad
:lol:
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Chicken sees a salad
:lol:
