G'day jon_m
Your on the right track mate, I do think you need two torches and keep them back out a bit from the graphite crucible, I have the nozzles of the torches only about half way into the hebel block.
And yes you don't need very much borax, first use of a new crucible I put maybe 1/4 teaspoon in with 65grams of cleanish nuggets, the cleaner the gold (acid cleaned) the less borax I use, and because there is remaining flux/borax lining the crucible for the next times it is used I put a lot less in.
The graphite crucibles do wear away from the heat anyway but I get at least twenty or more uses from one before it gets to thin, and I just crush it and pan of the remaining fine gold that is stuck in the glass flux/borax which is in the old crucible.
cheers dave