Old Sayings

[Bobh]

Sharp as a bowling ball
Not the sharpest pencil in the case
Up & down like a harlots pants
Cold as a witches tit

 

[silver]

No time like tomorrow.

 

[blisters]

She can talk under wet cement wth a mouth full of marbles

 

[Guest]

Disappear as quick as a fart in a fan factory

 

[Keith]

Off like a bride's nightie,
On & off like a bride's nightie,
As flash as a rat with a gold tooth,
As old as Methuselah,
When Jesus played Fullback for Jerusalem,
Like a rat up a drainpipe,
As full as a fat woman's shoe,
All over the place like a dog's dinner,
As happy as Larry,
A Jackie Howe (workman's, blue singlet.)
Shoot through like a Bondi tram,
A Bondi chest (Far from Manly,)
Do you want a medal or the chest to pin it on?
A dog's breakfast (very poorly done job,)
As sick as a dog,
As crook as Rookwood (a cemetery in Sydney.)

 

[silver]

See you round like a risole.

 

[blisters]

Tomorrow leaves time for today

 

[DrDuck]

My old dad had a few:

As flash as a rat with a gold tooth

As ugly as a hatful of arseholes

Happy as a pig in *****

As foul as a fart in a bath

Face like a beaten favorite

Face like a warped sandshoe

Face like a dropped pie (after being in a fight)....

Useless as a hip pocket in a singlet

And I think an original one when hippies with long hair and beards started to get about - Head like a **** house mop.

 

[Dave law]

God helps those who help themself - God help those who get caught helping themself.

 

[pauly250]

nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs

 

[BigWave]

Slippery as eels in a barrel of snot

 

[silver]

Hay makes the Bull fat, Bull makes the cow fat.

 

[rocketaroo]

so hungry, I could eat the arse out of a rag doll.

 

[SCROUNGER]

So hungry i could eat the arse out of a low flying duck.

 

[kawman]

its a dogs life.. if you cant eat it, piss on it, or fornicate with it you are not interested in it.

 

[Nightjar]

A couple of chops short of a barbecue
Couple of kangaroos loose in the top paddock
Not the sharpest tool in the shed
So hungry could eat the crutch out of a Afghan camel drivers underpants

 

[SCROUNGER]

LIghts are on but there's no one home.

If he moved any quicker he'd be going backwards.

 

[Tathradj]

Bloke called Negus,
Only worked for 60 minutes.

 

[Billy]

Describing someone a little hmmmm...... slow.

"The lights are flashing, the bell's are ringing, but, there's no train coming!"

 

[SCROUNGER]

Be careful what you wish for, it may come true.