Always liked this joke:
An old prospector had been mining in the mountains for over nine years and gotten nowhere. Since hed already eaten his mule he strapped on his last half skin of water and finally gave up and headed toward the only town he knew was anywhere close.
Almost two weeks later he dragged himself into the town and spotted the saloon. He barely pushed past the swinging doors and almost fell against the bar where several cowboys were telling stories.
He yanked on the sleeve of the closest cowboy and said, Hey, cowpoke buy me a drink.
The cowboy disdainfully looked the bedraggled old man over and replied, Get outa here old man, afore I shoot yer foot off. I aint buyin drinks fer no one.
The prospector tried again with the same results. Finally he espied a brass spittoon sitting on the floor by the corner of the bar and said, Buy me a drink or ahll drink outa that thar spitoonie.
The cowboy snarled and said, I dont care what ya do, old timer, jest leave me alone.
The prospector wandered over to the spittoon and lifted it to his lips.
By now everyone else in the saloon was watching the scene and were afraid the prospector would carry out his threat.
The old man tipped back the spittoon and started chugging down the contents of the spittoon. Everyone in the saloon, including the cowboy, started gagging and choking and retching.
The cowboy, green to the gills, said, Stop old man. Ill buy you all the drinks ya want, just stop!
The old prospector kept on chugging until the spittoon was empty, then set it on the floor and wiped the drool from his lower lip.
The cowboy, weak from retching, leaned against the bar. I said Id buy ya drinks old man, why didnt ya stop?
I tried, the old prospector replied wearily, his own face green, But it was all one piece.
An old prospector had been mining in the mountains for over nine years and gotten nowhere. Since hed already eaten his mule he strapped on his last half skin of water and finally gave up and headed toward the only town he knew was anywhere close.
Almost two weeks later he dragged himself into the town and spotted the saloon. He barely pushed past the swinging doors and almost fell against the bar where several cowboys were telling stories.
He yanked on the sleeve of the closest cowboy and said, Hey, cowpoke buy me a drink.
The cowboy disdainfully looked the bedraggled old man over and replied, Get outa here old man, afore I shoot yer foot off. I aint buyin drinks fer no one.
The prospector tried again with the same results. Finally he espied a brass spittoon sitting on the floor by the corner of the bar and said, Buy me a drink or ahll drink outa that thar spitoonie.
The cowboy snarled and said, I dont care what ya do, old timer, jest leave me alone.
The prospector wandered over to the spittoon and lifted it to his lips.
By now everyone else in the saloon was watching the scene and were afraid the prospector would carry out his threat.
The old man tipped back the spittoon and started chugging down the contents of the spittoon. Everyone in the saloon, including the cowboy, started gagging and choking and retching.
The cowboy, green to the gills, said, Stop old man. Ill buy you all the drinks ya want, just stop!
The old prospector kept on chugging until the spittoon was empty, then set it on the floor and wiped the drool from his lower lip.
The cowboy, weak from retching, leaned against the bar. I said Id buy ya drinks old man, why didnt ya stop?
I tried, the old prospector replied wearily, his own face green, But it was all one piece.
